Category Archives: Graphic design

Vaccine waiver for evolution objectors

For those of you who object to the existence of evolution, here’s a handy sticker to place on your health insurance card so you don’t get vaccinated by accident. Just print PDF onto sticker paper … and give extras to your like-minded friends. The flu virus is constantly evolving, so hoping these will come in handy. Or, if you don’t think the flu virus is evolving, ask for last year’s vaccine … it’s much cheaper!

Vaccine waiver

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Donate to the Charles Darwin Foundation

If you’re in the sciency mood on Giving Tuesday, here’s a good cause: The Charles Darwin Foundation. I suspect they’d be glad to hear from you any day, though. The center may close down due to lack of funds (details). Please spread the word, especially to evolved millionaires.

Charles Darwin in a Santa hat

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Open letter to produce managers re: yams

Dear Produce Manager,

If you want to sell more orange-fleshed sweet potatoes, craft your labels with “yams” in parentheses, like this:

Sweet potatoes (“yams”)

Because you are a produce manager, you undoubtedly know that a yam is a completely unrelated thing, so using quotation marks will indicate to ignorant shoppers that you are not actually selling yams. As you also surely know, “yam” is regional slang used by some (generally older folks) to refer to a sweet potato that has orange flesh. But if you only have “yams” on label, some shoppers might get flustered and leave for another store that labels sweet potatoes as “sweet potatoes.” Still others are looking for a specific variety of orange-fleshed sweet potato (Beauregard, Jewel, etc.), so list that, too. E.g.,

‘Beauregard’ sweet potatoes (“yams”)

That’s a lot of text, but different varieties are good for different recipes, and some of your customers are over-educated foodies who care deeply about such details. Ideally, cut one in half and cover in plastic wrap to convince skeptical shoppers that it does, indeed, have orange flesh.

Sincerely,
Colin Purrington

These are sweet potatoes

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